Mel's Rule

... imparts that delicate smokey flavor and texture found only in the charred remains of grass-eaters in from the all day de-worming project and brought to you by thoughtful smokers thereof and by smokers I refer to the masters of the smoke arts and drip pan handlers guild who know a thing or two about burned flesh.

... love is a many splintered thing

Please have fun in spite of yourself, now of course. Still working on it myself and figure if one works 40 years and retires @ 57 years of age then one has only had fun for around 17 years counting nights and weekends.
So the goal now is to have more fun fun than fun work fun even if the fun fun part is boring and under funded. ha...!

Never found a fun job zakly except the summer of '67 when working on the Lakeway marina was a 17 year old's wet dream. Or maybe liberty somewhere in some exotic swamp away from the ship a few years later. Whatever. I forget. Everything else has been scything under the sun. Gimme a ship and a star to steer by or barring that, a non-crisis weekend in the shade while the steaks are browning on the barbi, Miles is on the box and everything's right in the world all the live long day. Right?

Mels Rule baeebuuh!!!

... but then there are events beyond me: a young family member with a chip on his head decided to defy conventional wisdom and used up his luck when he wrecked 5 cars and knocked up his teenage bitch slut person. El Kid owes money for the next 100 years and the child aint even been born. He's really a bigger idiot than his parents will admit and he's only 21 going on 0. Meanwhile he admits sirehood for the time being of said bastard child stepping up and admitting publicly that he fucked his girl friend in front of his parents.
I'm screaming for a timeout and it aint even my fucking problem, even a little bit except there will be another death in the family soon enough and calling for pat-tests to make sure who's going to pay for this paint job is the only thing to do.

Ike clination like yo

the guys over at FEMA slay me. the coast is beat to shit, people's done down in the dumps over dis. yo!
local storm help is spread pretty thin what with the motherfucking war and all using up the help @. yo!
and away we go mumbling into the next room content in the shades of day while all the while at bay.
yo!

in leu of monsters...

...Bonster got her growed up shots the other day and her tag and everthing so now she's 4 months into the growed dog's life. she seems to enjoy being a dog so far as far as a dog can be observed to be enjoying itself in the general clatter and hubbub of your mind and doesn't seem to harbour any regrets for past crimes and/or high times but she is a child dog still and being a dog, being what it is, is what you get for being a dog. in most cases not a bad deal but you never know around here unless you're my dog. meanwhile these motherfucking politics are killing me like watching fucking paint dry what the hell is it with some people putting noony noony boo boo's in charge of the ice cream?

i know one damn thing motherfucker and i aint sayin that just because i can but i aint because i can.

got it?

anyway-

going to dallas in a couple of days to mingle with n-laws over the week end watch football eat drink meet mary tomorrow we die for about 2 hours max, i'm the youngest retiree in the bunch yes i'm liking it fine thank you, nodding off between the penalty flags...

casual tuesday

god here we go again. the moms is flaming out. gnat turds perhaps in the synapse causing a misdeed of electrons and disrupting the normal course of free association in the elderly brain by cluttering it with the hubris of daily whim. there is no cure. old age is terminal and all I can do is provide support from the bench which includes stuff I care not to mention like the ice floe north of the Bering Straits along with the frightful weather that accompanies said colder currents.

bonster monster is keeping us well lubed and cubed. her sparkling performances take us furthur. the game is afoot and they aint got nothing on her.

then play on...

Miss Bonny Blue Jean of the BonnyBonnyBooBaaBay

The Bonster Monster is the news and that aint much but she's fine and getting on like a glove. At 3.6 months her deductive powers astound and confound and are proving to be formidable. She's my baby girl doggie oh yes she is and will not let me forget it no my leetle bon bon, my leetle cauliflower.

Windowpane Theology

...and so it goes. Fucking pouring down rain with me and the pup warming a stump in the shade. Gotta play the laylow game today to minimize potty breaks. No training today nopes. Just me and the Bonster on a Tuesday sittin around here doing our best at nothin better to do. With the wife at work, there's no CNN creeping me out from across the room. Best way I know to get depressed is listen to CNN all day. Best way to stay out of that is leave the TV off. Hello?? Today I got all my news from the weather radar on the NWS web site. Much more refreshing than politics and warfare and changes faster than any fucking pointy head politician can conjure for us or promise us in televised debates with other pointy head political big spenders who promise to eat your babies and shit pure fucking gold in return. Warfare is always the cheap way to your heart. The expense comes later when you realize how had you were but then oops, you're broke and it's too fucking late. Oh dear god. Cry me a river but what the fuck were you thinking sending a generation off to die? And for what again?
I highly recommend keeping an eye on the weather because it influences you. Yes you. And it always will.

re:

i sally ferth

steel rims in sand

""...nothing surprises me..." lamented Cusecio squinting into the late afternoon sun as the wagon wheels of his stencil, redlining it downhill in a merry bliss shedding all detractors and their tractors alike, shook to beat the band I dare say and because really nothing ever surprised him even a little bit, even after the war and all because he was so surprised to be alive you know he just remained surprised. Like a baby duck every day he did and his wife always noticed how surprised he was every morning. He got out of bed everyday in the morning because he was so
surprised.
It was as foreign a concept I could imagine being so surprised and not being so surprised in/at the same time and space especially in the morning. Cusecio was an odd duck, a queer bird. Especially in the morning. Was considered by many to be quite shell-shocked and for him far as he was concerned that was nothing new and his gravity was matched. As a result this this whatever, zoning, or whatever, redlining downhill stencilfixer was fixing to become the surprise and he didn't even know it. The fix was in the mix."

...but I digress...

New pup Bonny is a heartbreaker. She's doing well and promises to be just as difficult as we thought she'd be. She's kinda like a teenager on four legs. More like a lot like a teenager on four legs.

puppy hell in a basket

today is the first full day around here for the new house mate: a 10 week old cow dog that flew in yesterday from out of state. she's kept me up most of the night with congestion, loose stool and general lack of sleepiness or remorse to which all i can do in response is sigh and say to myself i told you so. to the vet the first thing this morning when they open for her shots and maybe some antibiotics to clear up her chest, another day resting then to boot camp.
so far she shows a lot of good sense and great temperament and when housebreaking is done, maybe i'll get some rest.

aawww!

ya know I sit here and I wonder but I don't give a shit because I don't feel a thing and I wonder if talking to my silly self would help but I don't think so I'm drinking, beer to be exact, and I don't remember being here except for the meow part then I remember the bow wow part and it reminds me of the you know what part and then it's the no shit part. who should I believe?


...but be that as it may, it still can be the end of the world without us knowing it or for all I care
and in the mean time I'm going like, aaww shucks, what a beautiful baby.

pick a number, get in line, take a seat. get ready...

more from the retirement front

oh yes. the u o' t union is very rich dribbledribbledribble a tarjai but i tend to stay in my car these days so trolling the campus is out unless i park and walk 40 blocks trying to look innocent which in my advanced stage of decay, i shant do since my wife works on campus and the cops know me. small world.

mondays aren't so bad anymore. by the way. they tend to zippy right on by and leave me feeling utterly refreshed mostly. i recently went inside the HRC @ UT to look up a novel writer person i like had some papers there in the archive. i remembered how to act in a research library. it was inspiring.

been following the Peloponnesian War with more than a passing interest here lately. o my fucking gawd can Thucydides deliver a point or what?
rest of the time i'm blending in with the scenery. just buried our 3rd dog and already looking for a new pup. need new tires truck's almost paid for traffic sucks and gas is killing us but wtf, it cant eat us so right now the Riley, Life Of is ok if anybody asks. might get a chance here to buy wolf lady's property next door which would be like scoring a touchdown and winning the superbowl in the last second on national tv and getting laid on the fantail at the same time. awesome.
epic of wolf lady is long story.

we're trying not to get out much for obvious reasons so home grown deep in the heart of hanging out around the house is about the only game awake. parental issues on both sides have proven to be attention mongers. so far no need to get second job. having enough distraction right now for busy worth's. hope the wife can retire soon too then we can really save money.

whatever they tell you about retirement, dont believe a fucking thing they tell you and dont ask me because you wouldnt believe me anyway but if you did ask i would say yeps to you and to the uninitiated who insist on proof there is life after work. there is.
trust me...

bwwwhhhaahhaaahhhaaaaa

skegma hai

this retirement thing is alright but my working for a living friends have forgotten all about me being wrapped up in their so called careers and all and they just fucking forgot about me about as much i them so there and frankly francis surely that's okay because after all i'm retired so fuck it. right francis? a ship to drive would be the way to go friends or not then i could go skiing on a salmon too but...

not todaa oh mortal 1 bcuz 2dae is knot there dai as well

i care not what i think for today you saw pigs fly. oh yes you did.

so im thinking about surfing and personalized custom shoes for sleeping. but most of the time not. most of the time is away so thats fine for shoes. mostly.

texacajun gumboil

Have you heard oh noo, but bet it's good for you too like the side of melted butter on hot pepper cornbread part not to mention the wow factor of dining in faux posh Houston digs at the Big Ass Mall with a simple air of laid back arrogance as opposed to say, Dallas with it's britelitebigcitious elegance and conspiracy theorists lurking in every one-eyed sedan on the street after dark suggesting once again that mega-metro trends will probably be the death of us all if the food or the snipers don't kill us first.

hell bound

if we had listened to them in 1971 we might not be where we are now. if we hadn't let them lie to us as to why we are fighting this time around too, we might not be where we are now. if j.f.k. hadn't been killed, we might not be where we are now. if nixon hadn't been elected, we might not be where we are now. if bush hadn't been re-elected, we might not be where we are now. if enough people had said no, we wouldn't be where we are now.

Winter Soldier: America Must Hear These Vets' Stories

suck x suckfest

Lo these many days I've waited for the crowded streets to despair and disgorge their crawling multitudes in an out of townerly direction. My table is never clean and the waitress always surly. I would have tipped her if she had brought me all my change from that 10 spot but the 50 cents she kept cost her a dollar. I left the waiting list unattended for I care not, the atmosphere poisoned by second rate art. fucking austin...
The voices are insincere and overly loud, pointless to a fault. The music is dramatic and raw and utterly devoid of meaning, the bands being full of themselves upon their stage of irrelevancy and me anxious for them to leave and take their doting fawning fellatio devotees with them. Pierce your labia elsewhere please and hey you, yeah you, get the fuck out of my way before I cold cock your boyfriend.
This town really sucks.

oh woe...

well evidently your pulse has gone the way of wayward youth since there's to be no way of getting a rise out of you short of setting your hair on fire and even then at your advanced age you probably wouldn't twitch what with not having a pulse and all. you see. on the other foot, you might be in perpetual swoon due to the accelerated pulse now positively puling through your pinhead. for that i can understand but the other, the not moving, waking up on the right side of the dirt is preferable and in fact encouraged. all knitting aside, woe behark you? moy beane prhaps or worst kiawkle to smoot. no way hose be. lot much to see time on and on. no news here, pretty much steady edifice. the moms is going down in flames keeping me busy picking up the pieces. glad i have the time now to deal with it. other than that, all over? the more things change, the more they stay the same: you never call, write or take me to lunch and it's always too noisy around here.

living in a yellow can o beans

"Flying" from Magical Mystery Tour might have been a good choice as an accompaniment to the restless wind inside a letter box.

NASA Launching Beatles Tune Into Space

if you have to ask

you probably can't afford it.
another campaign year grinding me to a nub in the dust of the iraqimolcajeti. i'm so numb, my ears are ringing and now the motherfucker, this bastard, this... comes clean and talks about how he use to drink too much and how his faith has pulled him through and it was only a few lies to get his way and only 4000 dead on our side so far and not to mention the fact the world hates him but jesus loves him cuz he told him so and addiction is bad bad bad and god's on his side and america is god's team and we have to watch over your shoulder america to be sure cause we have to know and lizard skin don't itch trust us even though it's been 7 years. if i was an immigrant i would leave on the next tramp steamer.
not listening to it doesn't make it any less true george. go ahead turn it off. change the channel. it's all hate tv, it's all a distraction from your pious sobriety eh? george. you dumb fuck.

plowshares into laptops

the rest of the story...

Frontline Blogger Covers War in Iraq With a Soldier’s Eyes - New York Times